The blurt came as we were talking about work and retirement. My friend is retired. He had an extraordinarily successful business career. If you ask him what he does now, he will reply, "I am retired." And he says it with real pride, as he should, and as he deserves. He worked hard all his life to become financially independent so he could make just such a reply to the age-old question, or should I say the old-age question of "what do you do?"
Upon noticing my white hair, or in a discussion of my 50th high school reunion, people ask me , "Are you retired?" And when I reply, "No," I feel like a failure, as if being not retired combined with white hair is a sign of financial failure, poor planning and so on. It may be, but I know now that I have relevance.
It was a wake up call when, as I began to putt on the 8th green, my friend blurted out, "you have relevance." In other words, you still work. Up to that point in our relationship, I was modestly envious of my friend's usual retirement response because of all the inferences that such a response includes. Relevancy however may trump retirement. It is a necessary part of good mental health to be needed, to have some deadlines and to pass on your wisdom to others. Retirement to me is reasonable control over my time while still contributing to the success of others. And by that definition I am retired with relevance.
I have that reasonable time control and that relevance and I can still putt with my friends. I am fortunate that way. And this sunny day, a muggy Saturday morning in the heartland, I am at my desk becoming relevant for awhile for a client in another state. I will putt later.
Indeed I am lucky. I am engaged.
No comments:
Post a Comment